COMMERCIALS THAT ANNOY (1-2003)

The Super Bowl is big news this time of year. But almost as 
big are the commercials that sponsor the game. 

Sponsors pay well over a million dollars for the right to 
broadcast 30-seconds-worth of information about their 
products. And that’s on top of the cost of producing the 
spot in the first place.

Most of the better-publicized Super Bowl commercials have 
one thing in common: humor. The advertisers are betting 
that by making their ads humorous the public will remember 
what they’re selling. Sometimes it works; sometimes it 
doesn’t.

Unfortunately for the poor TV viewers, however, there are 
other ways of making commercials memorable than with 
cutting-edge humor. And one of the most popular methods 
seems to be to annoy the heck out of the viewing public.

Whatever method an advertiser employs to get the consumer’s 
attention, the main goal of the spot is just that – to get 
attention. If the ad producer isn’t clever enough to get it 
by humor, he may have to resort to screaming at the viewer, 
or insulting the viewer’s intelligence with mindless 
rhetoric or a cheesy jingle.

While many of the latest Super Bowl commercials may be as 
entertaining as the game itself (depending on one’s view of 
football), the TV continues to be flooded primarily with 
substandard, locally-produced commercials that do little 
more than irritate. Others are merely forgettable. A few 
examples come to mind.

The TV is on, but you’re in the kitchen preparing a 
sandwich because there’s a commercial on. Suddenly, your 
ears are offended by the sound of a large bass drum beating 
– slowly at first, then with rapid-fire reports. You hear 
no announcer hawking his wares. You hear no silly jingles. 
Nothing can be heard except those drum beats. 

You saunter back into the TV room just as the commercial 
ends to find out that it was sponsored by ATA, the 
Indianapolis-based airline. The entire commercial is 
visual. If you don’t see it, you would never know who 
sponsored it.

That immediately leads to the question, “What were the ad 
executives thinking?” TV consists of both images and 
sounds. To use only the image capability without any 
productive sound is a waste of half the air space. If you 
must use one or the other, the best choice would be to use 
the sound. A blank screen with an effective audio message 
would be a better sell than the other way around. Just ask 
the guys who sponsor radio programs.

Then there are those car dealership commercials. They have 
to be among the most annoying of all. Does every dealership 
use the same ad agency? All their commercials look and 
sound alike.

Unlike ATA, they fill the screen with too much information, 
blinking from one shot to another several times per second 
while the announcer shouts at viewers with a loud, echoing 
voice. And the more reverb the better.

One exception to this “car dealership rule” comes from 
Community Chrysler in Martinsville. It doesn’t shout at 
you, but the cheap, single-chord, cheesy jingle is just as 
annoying. Talk about your low-budget wastes of air space; 
this one takes the cake.

Finally, the most annoying commercial of all time has to go 
to Newport’s Outlet Store. Mr. Newport himself is the 
culprit for making these commercials a gag-fest. His high-
pitched voice is cringe-inducing. But by the end of the 
commercial, there’s no mistaking what the guy’s selling. 
His retort of “come on up to Newport’s Outlet Store” is 
repeated at least a dozen times in the space of 30 seconds.

I guess when you’re in the advertising business, even 
annoying your potential customers is acceptable as long as 
they remember what it is you’re selling.